Any parent who goes through a divorce has to deal with the fact that they will not be able to be around their children all the time. That doesn’t mean you cannot be an involved parent who supports their children and has a solid relationship with them. It is simply going to look different than when you were married. Justifiably, this can be frightening for parents. How often am I going to see my children? Will I be able to spend time with them during the holidays? What happens if my spouse doesn’t let me see my kids?
The anxiety you feel is very real, and many of your concerns can be addressed when you create a parenting plan. View it as a contract you and your spouse have regarding your roles and responsibilities as they pertain to your children. You and your attorney will work through this together, which will likely entail significant negotiation. Not only is a firm plan in place good for you, but it will also lay the groundwork for creating the solid co-parenting relationship your children need and deserve. Here are some tips for making one.
Consider All the Factors
In all likelihood, both parents will want to spend as much time with their children as possible. Before deciding how you want to split your time between you and your spouse, look at your life as it stands now and what it may look like in the future.
- What does your work schedule look like?
- Does either one of you intend to go back to work?
- Where are you and your former spouse going to live?
- What kind of scheduling considerations do the children have?
Build a parenting plan around the answers to these questions. If you want to have 50/50 custody, are you and your spouse going to be able to make that work? An excellent parenting plan limits your potential for future conflicts (and fighting) because they allow you to deal with the issues when you have an attorney to strategize and problem-solve with.
Be Detailed
Like any contract, the more details you have, the better it will be. Your attorney will be invaluable during this process because they are experienced with some points you may overlook. In addition to physical and legal custody, here are some things to consider:
- Times and locations for pickup and drop off.
- How will you handle holidays and school vacations?
- Who pays for medical insurance?
- Your plan for dealing with disputes (you may opt for including a mediator to contact)
- If you want to leave the state (or country) with the kids, cite how much notice you need to give.
Get Started Today with a Family Law Attorney
At Fraser, Wilson, & Bryan, P.C., we understand how complex a divorce can be when children are involved. If you have concerns about custody, take comfort in knowing that we will always work toward the outcome that is in your child’s best interest. To continue this conversation with an attorney, contact us today to schedule a free consultation.
